menstruation - discussing with daughters

With girls starting to menstruate early these days I am wondering what
to do about my daughter.
She is 8, and I have read/heard that some girls start at 9 or 10, this seems
so young to me, she will be 9 in May)
I ordered a book about it, and I am wondering if at 8 she is to young to
start learning about this or if it is an appropriate topic.

toypup...

I learned in a TLC type show that girls will start menstruating when they
reach 110 lbs. Since they are reaching that at earlier ages, they are
menstruating earlier. I don't know how well this holds up IRL, but I asked

shinypenny...

I think you may have misheard that. It's not about reaching a certain
weight, but a certain body fat percentage. Girls in the western world,
with higher fat diets, are reaching puberty earlier and earlier.

It does make sense that our bodies would have evolved that way. In
times of famine, it wouldn't be wise to get pregnant. Times of plenty
ensure the survival of both mom and child.

And yet, the research is still inconclusive because we don't know if
the extra body fat triggers hormones to start the puberty changes, or
the hormones trigger the body to store extra body fat so it can make
things like breasts and hips. And there is also research out there that
suggests it might be hormones in our water supply that are triggering
puberty earlier.

Chookie...

I'm unconvinced. I started at 10 and my sister at 9 (we shared the same room
and I suspect my pheromones started her off). Neither of us were tall or fat,
so I'm sure neither of us had hit 110 lb at that age.

I have heard that menstruation is triggered by the proportion of fat in the
body -- which is why anorexics stop menstruating.

one coworker when her DD started and she did start early when she hit 110
lbs. Don't know how this applies if someone is naturally small and never
hits 110 lbs. Perhaps it just predicts the early starters.

shinypenny...

I was 13 and weighed maybe 90-95 lbs. I didn't hit 110 until college.
DD#1 just got her first period, just a few months after turning 13, and
is nowhere near 110 yet (she's about 95 lbs).

The doctor had told us that she would start menstruating about a year
after the first signs of puberty, and that proved correct. Which means
that DD#2 will likely start next year, around age 12, because around
age 11 she started showing her first signs of puberty. It is true that
DD#2 has a higher proportion of body fat than her sister and myself.
But her "baby fat" is rapidly being transformed this year into curves.
She'll be curvier than her sister.

enigma...

well, i didn't hit 110 until i was in college (that freshman
15), but i started at 16... so, 92 pounds.
genetics & diet both have an influence.
lee

What age should parents discuss menstruation with their daughter ??

Ericka Kammerer...

It's none too early. Yes, there are girls who start
that early, and even if they don't start menstruating that
early, they start with some of the other changes associated
with puberty. She needs to know about these things before
events overtake her and she's living in fear because her
body is changing unexpectedly and she thinks there's something
terribly wrong with her.
In an ideal world, this sort of information is shared
in an age appropriate way from toddlerhood on. It's certainly
not too early to start. You also don't want her to get all
of her information from her friends, many of whom will be
gaining some information about this (and some from less than
reputable sources).
In most schools, they're discussing this sort of
thing by the time the kids are in 5th grade. You also
likely want to have discussed the issues before then.

Best wishes,
Ericka

Stephanie...

Now bear in mind that my daughter is only 2, I am likely full of horse
pucky. But there is precious little chance that she will ever not know since
we don't seem to ever shut the bathroom door. I always new. There were these
things on the back of the toilet. I asked my Mom what they were, and she

Stephanie...

I wonder why one would consider NOT educating about this?

Jeff...

You had periods when you were 60 years old? I thought periods stopped when
women are around 50 years old. ;-)

toto...

Heavens, I am glad I don't still have periods. (I just turned 60,
Jeff - you callin' me an old lady?)

Jeff...

No.

I am only forty and am glad I don't have periods, either.

Jeff

Jeff

told me. We had to refine the understanding... But it was a total non-issue.

dragonlady...

As a matter of fact, after The Class in fifth grade, one of the boys
asked me what we'd learned. I thought it was pretty fascinating (this
IS where I learned), so I showed him the booklet we'd been given.

I was punished for it.

I found out years later that my mother reamed out the teacher for
punishing me, since it was just an indication that I didn't think it was
something embarrassing or shameful. I just wish Mom had told ME she
disagreed with the teacher -- but way back then, it was considered
absolutely critical to always appear to be supporting the teachers.

Is there some reason to worry about age?

I also order a book, called " What's going on down there?" for my son, I
will have to look it over before I decide when he should read it ...as I
know little about "what and when it all starts for boys..... I plan to read
both books first, before the kids do. ( My son is only 6 so I am sure I have
some time, it's more the daughter I'm concerned with right now)

-L....

I would discuss it with your daughter. I started at 11 and while I
knew what menstruation was I was freaked out when it happened to me
because I didn't know what it was - it didn't look like blood. Too
much info is better than not enough, IMO.

Banty...

You should start now with your daughter. She'll soon have classmates who are
mensturating, even if she won't for awhile.

It's not a difficult topic if it weren't for parental squeemishness about it. I
started with my son when he was little, explaining that there is a monthly cycle
women have, where the place where the baby grows builds up with a nurishing
tissue, but the tissue has to be *fresh*, so every month, if a baby isn't
growing there, it sloughs off so new tissue will grow just in case a baby starts
to grow. And that's the five-year old explanation. You can get even more into
it for a nine year old, and you should introduce the feminine products and
explain them.

I wouldn't leave your boy out of it completely. He needs to know about it, too.

Nan...

IMO, she's old enough to learn about it. While I haven't gone into
any graphic details since my dd wouldn't be able to process that kind
of info, I've been discussing menstruation with her for 2 years, and
she'll just be turning 6.

I've found that it's easier on me to just impart snippets of
information at the appropriate times (she saw my sanitary supplies in
the bathroom and asked about them, or she noticed when I was changing
a pad or tampon) and to let them ask questions instead of trying to
sit down and go over the whole topic all at once.

Renee...

I'd talk to her like others have said. My mom started her period when
she was 9, though her daughters didn't start until we were 11 or 12.
So, you never know.