Send to a daycare or not

Mt 15 month has started going to a home daycare. She likes playing with
the kids but cries a lot (literally screaming and calling us) when we
leave her there or even in between . She has not yet adjusted to eating
properly over there. The main reasons I wanted her to go to a daycare
rather than a nanny is because she loves being with kids and she is a
picky eater so she might learn eating good food when with other kids.
Before this I had been watching her andbeofre my mother-in-law or some
family member. She has a lot of separation anxiety because last few
months she was mostly with me and my husband. I also wanted to send her
to a daycare since her social skills might improve. When I was a kid -
I went directly to school at 4 and it was very difficult..from what my
mom says..I ddnot have social skills and use to cry all day for many
months. Keeping that in mind - I am all the more anxious to send her to
a daycare soon but it is being hard on her. I am worried if I am taking
teh right decision? If I wait and send her directly to pre-school will
that be more difficult than now? Because in home daycare - she will get
more attention than in a pre-school.Will a year later help her handle
separation stress better? What would you - experienced parents -
recommend?

Ericka Kammerer...

I think that the vast majority of kids will
adjust with a good, supportive effort, so if you want
to keep her in her current daycare and you feel that
the daycare and provider are good, I don't think there's
any harm in doing that and working through the issue now.
That said, if your main goal is school
readiness, I also don't think there's any problem
with waiting until she's two or three years old to
start preschool. It may be easier to start her when
she's older and more verbal and more able to understand.
Much of this is developmental, so what she has to
learn and do to be successful at going to daycare
now is different from what she'll have to do at two
or three years old. Just because it's challenging
now doesn't mean it will be as bad or worse later.

Best wishes,
Ericka

Welches...

I wouldn't worry about her social skills at 15 months, they don't really
have them! Also at that age I don't think it's likely to effect her eating
either. If those are your only reasons for sending her to day care then I'd
take her out.
Yes, a year should make some difference to separation as they can understand
better then, but it still doesn't guarantee it.
I'd recommend closer to 3 for social building, and she's more likely to
build them in small group situations with mummy in the background. Try
inviting friends back who have children of the same age. You're then there
to advise them, help them, and step in if things get too difficult, which
gives them some confidence. In my experience that's a better way to build
them up.
Debbie