How long to leave cat

My lady doesn't want my cat, Bert, to visit - 'he'll destroy my...' So
I leave him.

For how many days/nights is that fair/ok?

Studio apt. Plenty food//water.

Jo Firey...

It really depends on the cat. Some might be just fine, eat sleep and poop
for I'd say no more than four nights.

Others would likely spill the water, eat far more food than you would
imagine and overfill and then distribute the contents of the liter box.
That is in the first 8 hours. From there on out carpet, drapes upholstery
etc are fair game.

Really depends on how active and how secure the cat is.

Sam...

To echo other posters, you might find a more harmonious relationship
with a different lady.

EvelynVogtGamble(Divamanque)...

Have you considered simply changing girlfriends? If you're
a cat person, she doesn't sound like a very good bet for a
long-term relationship! (And since you can be less fussy
about a short-term one, why would you bother with her at all?)

badwilson...

There's no future in your relationship with her.

Enfilade...

For the record, here is our guideline:

1. Cats alone in the house, with extra food/water, and radio left on
to keep them "company" -- Maximum two nights.
2. Cats alone in the house, with radio left on, with someone coming to
check in on them every day and put down fresh food and water and clean
litter -- Maximum four nights.
3. Five nights or more, a kennel where they will be supervised for
their stay and receive playtime and one-on-one snuggle time, with toys
provided by us.

That being said, if your lady won't accept your cat in her house, is
there any chance she will accept your cat in her life? I suspect not.
Therefore, if you want a relationship to be anything more than this one
is now--if you are interested in a relationship with you & a woman
living under the same roof--you might want to consider other
candidates.

CatNipped...

Brad, I would suggest you look for another lady, one less concerned with
"things" and more concerned with sentient creatures. Not only would I not
allow my lover's cat to be abandoned, but I would not want my lover to deal
with the repercussions of leaving his cat.

Bobblespin...

Your lady has given you a peak at what she will always be like. My way or
the highway.

Adrian...

Leave her instead, if she can't accept your cat she's not worth knowing.

jmcquown...

How many days are you talking about? Who's cleaning the litter box? Most
cats don't like dirty litter boxes; it encourages them to find other spots
to pee/poop on and trust me, when they get upset they definitely will
display their anger this way. I scoop Persia's box twice a day.

How do you define "plenty" of food & water? And doesn't Bert require some
personal attention? Someone to pat him, play with him and say hey, your
"dad" didn't abandon you, he'll be back.

wafflycat...

Change the lady, not the cat. The comment you credit her with shows a
materialistic tendency more than a caring one.

EvelynVogtGamble(Divamanque)...

In my experience, you can have either cats or really nice,
undamaged furniture - it's almost impossible to have BOTH!

Annie Wxill...

Hi Evelyn,
I'd say that the cat trees in our house have some really shredded parts, but
we have to blame ourselves for the recliner mechanism that wore out and the
cushions that sag on the couch.
The cats probably consider the shredded cat trees improved rather than
damaged.
Annie

Victor Martinez...

What she said.

Cheers, helen s