I am a cruel and heartless pet owner

Okay, I am a horrible, cruel, and heartless pet owner.

We've had 2" of sleet that has now been covered by 1/4" of solid ice. My
back yard has a bit of a slant to it, from right to left. On the left
side, by the fence, is a big red rock. Zipper's favorite pee place. So
he toddles out the door to go to his favorite pee place. He gets to the
middle of the yard and starts sliding. Amazingly self-posessed, he
simply stiffens his legs and slides down the slope. BONK. He hits the
rock. Hey! I'm at my spot! So he proceeds to try to lift his leg. Tries
the left leg. Does the splits. Hmmmm. Slides to the far side of the rock
and tries his right leg. Does the splits. This goes on for 2-3 minutes.
Finally, Zipper stops, gives the rock the hairy eyeball, snorts, and
decides he can find somewhere nicer to pee.

So off he goes, but instead of coming back closer to the house, where
the ice is thinner, he strikes for the back corner of the yard. Slipping
and sliding every step. Every few steps he'll stop, sniff, and try to
lift his leg. And do the splits.

Poor little guy, he just can't figure it out. It's like he's thinking
"hmmm. This has always worked for me before!"

And all I could do was stand at the kitchen window laughing like a
hyena. I am truly mean and heartless.

Cimawr...

Oh, you cruel person!!

Although considering how hard I laughed *reading* about it, I really don't
have room to talk. ;-D

As a side note (prolly going to jinx us by saying so), here in Maryland
we've hardly even HAD winter, as of yet. Last weekend it was in the 70's,
this weekend's been cooler but nowhere near what you'd expect for January.

Robin Nuttall...

Most of ours has been that way. We've been totally hammered twice--the
18" we got in a single night in December (the weekend of our agility
trial no less) and the ice this weekend. Tonight it's going to get below
zero. Other than that, we've had no winter.

Shelly...

Winter? What's that? It's been raining since, oh, Thursday or
Friday, and it doesn't look like it's going to stop any time soon.
And I'd really been hoping to get a look at Comet McNaught, too.
It is for to weep!

Lynne...

I've given up on trying to keep the floors clean. Hardwood AND carpet with
muddy pawprints. At least there is continuity of a theme!

As for cold? It's currently 40F! In January! Gah!

Janet B...

It's been close to 70 here. Absurd.

shore...

Tell us about it. But relief (temperature-wise, at least)
appears to be on its way:

Sionnach...

It went to *77* degrees in Cecil County last Saturday (the 6th, that is).
I was outside clearing briars, and ended up looking like I'd been in a fight
with a cat because I had to strip down to my short-sleeved T-shirt.

Also: Zipper? Just about the funniest little man EVAR. I can
picture him single-mindedly trying to accomplish his task, over and
over and over again. I trust he *did* finally figure out how to
pee on ice?

Robin Nuttall...

I watched this morning. He went out into the yard and pooped. That he
could do though there was a bit of comical spinning along the way and he
made a bit of a trail. He did not even make an attempt to lift his leg.
He trotted back to the edge of grass near the house and had himself a
leisurely pee.

The ice is now about a half-inch thick on top of the sleet. It cracks
and pops like gunfire when you walk on it and you can't make the merest
dent in it. The trees aren't quite as bad, they have about 1/4" of ice
on them. Most of what we got last night was rain, but rain on top of
sleet and ice tends to freeze up.

Lynne...

In what part of the country are you located? We've had so much rain that
one of only 2 roads that get me to civilization has been flooded out for 2
days now.

Robin Nuttall...

Central Missouri. FWIW, the ice could have been far, far worse. We had
2" of sleet on Friday with about 1/4" of ice over it. We were very lucky
to have the sleet, that prevented the roads from being quite so
trecherous. Then Sat we got a bit of a break. Sat night freezing rain,
Sun a break again for the morning but then in late afternoon we got
heavy rain that lasted for about 5 hours. We were really lucky right
here because the temps went up to 33 and stayed there, and we did get
rain, not more freezing rain. So the trees aren't completely weighed
down and I've had no power outages. Some of the areas not far away are
pretty devastated.

Today the bottom is dropping out of the mercury and it's 17 and going
lower. Supposed to be below zero tonight. This time last week it was 50.

I don't even want to think about what all this rain is doing to the poop in
the yard... it's so gray out and the yard is so muddy that I gave up
looking for it 2 or 3 days ago. I hope we get a good freeze tonight so I
can pick up what I imagine by now are poop pancakes.

shore...

One of the great things about cold weather when there's no
snow - frozen poop. When there's snow the hot poop sinks
through and is a pain to clean up, but that's another
matter.

But yeah, I'm with you on the endless rain and muddy
floors. I thought winter was supposed to mean a break from
all that.

I fully understand the really bad implications of climate change, but I
like mild winters!

FurPaw...

I must be too, because I'm ROFL as I read it.

Lynne...

Apparently so am I. That's hysterical! Worthy of video taping, in fact
(hint! hint!).

Robin Nuttall...

I don't have a video camera, sorry. I do wish I did, it would have been

montana wildhack...

Most digital cameras and phones will take videos now. FWIW.

Robin Nuttall...

Not mine. I'm sort of luddite when it comes to that stuff. I get a phone
to, duh, make phone calls. I have a cell phone, and it does take
pictures. But that's it. My digital camera is a bottom-of-the-line one
that does a sort of okay job, but it works. I've never owned a video
camera. Maybe someday, but it's not on top of my list of priorities.

worthy of an entry into some sort of "funniest videos" contest.

Lynne...

I don't have one, either. According to some people, that makes me a bad
parent.

But you know what they say, Robin: A picture is worth a thousand words!

MauiJNP...

that you are, to tell us this very funny story and then deprive us all of
pictures (or video) to go along with it

montana wildhack...

Yes, yes you are. And so am I.