Instruction manuals

Having fought my way from behind the packing cases I spent most of today
reading instruction manuals and what I'd like to know is who the H***

pmj...

LOL!!!
I think I will have to Frame this Post!!!
:-)

writes these things. In all cases what *should* have been an easy task ( and

Michaelangelo...

They are becoming more complicated partly because the equipment is more
complicated, partly because the people who write them think they've
discovered a new art form and partly because of the increasingly
litigious world in which we live. Omit even the smallest detail from
the destructions and you can be sure some customer, somewhere, will
sue.

A couple of years ago I replaced my front door lock. There was an
instruction leaflet enclosed which told me how to fit it - useful
templates etc - and at the very bottom it said, "to operate, insert key
and turn." There was even a drawing of a key being inserted and turned
just in case I couldn't understand the words. Without that advice my
house might easily have been left insecure

Ali...

Since other methods of operating locks not only exist but are commonplace
in some areas (consider remote & central locking on cars), I suppose such
instructions are neccessary.

Michaelangelo...

Maybe, but this was a Chubb lock with a bl**dy great brass (?) key and
not a push-button in sight.

Ali...

yeah, but it's conceivable (just) that a purchaser had never encountered a
key operated lock before, only the electronic kind :^)

pmj...

Usually, I think, they are written in some weird Foreign (usually
Far-Eastern) language & then (very badly) Translated, into a sort of
"Pidgen-Ingrish"...

Flyiñg Ñuñ 2°°6 +...

Apparently they employ specialist technical authors for such things. They
only seem to write them for people with specialist knowledge, don't they?
:(

BunnyHare...

Sounds like you had a very informative day then LOL
I suppose things have got more complicated since we were younger but I think
it is also something to do with Health and Safety - write everything down
then you can't be sued if something goes wrong. I still like those written
and translated from other languages though.

Michaelangelo...

So do I. The all-time best one I ever came across, though was when I
worked in the retail photographic trade (1st job). A company called
Hanimex imported an 8mm cine projector. The instructions for lacing up
the film and running it were contained in - a reel of film. :)

Good luck with catching up on the posts

often was when I came to actually do the thing) was made to sound like I
needed a degree in engineering/physics/ IT/whatever. Is there an award for
the most complicated instructions for a simple task? Wasn't life easier when
I was a girl, i.e. you plugged the phone in to the BT socket and put your

Ali...

You must be younger than I thought. When I was a lad, a young man even,
BT didn't provide sockets, neither did the Post Office. The phone was hard
wired into a connector box.

pantomonium...

And even standing in the same room as it with a screwdriver in your hand
was a capital offence.

fingers in a dial at the right holes and spoke to somebody. I actually used

pmj...

Yep, but that was in the days of the POTS (Plain Old Telephone
System)!!!

These days a Phone (even a LandLine Phone, let alone a Mobile Phone)
*is* actually *very* much more complicated than the old Dial type
Phone.
The whole Phone System itself has many more features & facilities
now, than it used to have...
All of which need to be Set up right & thus need varying levels of
complex instructions.

to remember people's phone numbers without the aid of a contacts list ( or
whatever fancy name each brand has), the phone only went *ring, ring* you
didn't get the choice of a full symphony for each caller. I'll not even
start on the microwave and the number of buttons/knobs just to heat
something and that's without even looking at cooking anything in it.
OK my brain is older *but* please do tell me that the manuals are getting

Flyiñg Ñuñ 2°°6 +...

You'll get no argument from me on that. :)

more complicated and I'm not completely stoopid :-)

pmj...

Yes, the Manuals *are* getting more complicated!
That's cos the products they are describing are much more complicated!

Think of something ordinary(?) such as a Television...

In the old days, there was just an On-Off Switch, a Volume Control
& a Rotary Channel Changer thingy (or a few Push Buttons)
& then, (behind a little flap, normally), were the extra controls,
such as Brightness & Contrast.

That was fine, when a TV was just used for watching TV Programmes on! -
& there were only 3 or 4 Channels)...

But as soon as there were more Channels available, then you can't have
just a simple Rotary Channel change Switch thingy, can you?
& the same goes for PushButton Channel changing.
With more than half a dozen or so Channels, it's impractical to have
a separate Button for each Channel, so we ended up with having to
"Dial in" the Channel Number on a Keypad...
Or using an "Up/Down" Channel Selector.
Both of which introduce much more complexity.
Cos when you can Dial in (say,) up to 100 different Channel Numbers,
using 2 Digit Numbers, from 10, through 11, 12, 13, etc, & 20, 21,
30, 31, right the way through to 98 & 99, that actually makes it
*much* more difficult to actaully Select a *Single* Digit Channel
Number, doesn't it?
:-(

How does the poor old channel Selector thingy know that when you Press
(for example) the "1" (or "2" etc,) Button, that you aren't then going
to Press another Button, for any of the 2 Digit Numbers over 9/10?

OK, *some* of them *do* actually assume just one digit, if you don't
Press another one within a certain time, but then yo uneed an
Instruction Book to explain that!!!

Ali...

Mine, which came without an instruction manual (which is part of the
reason it was cheap), will accept a leading zero, or just accept the
single digit after a short wait. Mostly I use the channel up button.

& with things like Video Recorders & DVD Players & Set Top Boxes etc,
(& TeleText!) all being used with TVs, that introduces yet *more*
complexity, all of which needs to be explained in the Instruction Manual

Flyiñg Ñuñ 2°°6 +...

Pass on that! :)

Hi BTW, I'm only popping in and out but tomorrow I hope to catch up on the
nearly 1000 ( you have been quiet haven't you ??? :-) ) posts. Well that's

Flyiñg Ñuñ 2°°6 +...

Sorry! I'll accept my part of the blame for that. :(

the plan ATM but who knows I may find another packing case or instruction

Flyiñg Ñuñ 2°°6 +...

Fingers crossed for you then. :)

manual :-)

pantomonium...

Products are going over the top now. The manufacturers' marketing
departments must constantly brainstorm 'value added' features to try to
gain the competitive edge. I was looking at some mobile handsets the other
week when a sales person edged over (uninvited) and started showing me the
latest device that apparently downloads songs it "hears" at the press of a
button. If you're in a pub and there's a song on the jukebox you just press
this button and it goes and finds it for you. I didn't believe him. I
already have alarm clock, messenging, email, IRC, camera, video recording
and playback, sound recording, web browsing, radio, mp3 player, personal
organiser, and occasional telephone call functions on my phone. If I like a
song I can walk to the jukebox to see what it's called or ask someone. Now
if it was able to tell me the name of a song if I hummed the tune then that
would be something.

But the thing that really made my eyes pop out the other evening was an
advert on TV for a toothbrush with an onboard computer. Why would that be

Flyiñg Ñuñ 2°°6 +...

Aye up Panto - your clock's a bit fast innit? :)

necessary?

Michaelangelo...

Or even an instruction manual for a packing case!